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Why am I single? (Not a whinge)
I met up with a nice girl today. We got on okay but there was no sparkage. Had a nice time, so this is all fine but I'd rally like to know why.
This isn't a whinge or a whine? I'm pretty okay with this at the moment. I'm mainly confused about it. More to the point it frequently causes me problems and I'd like to be able to solve it.
I'm reasonably good looking, I'm intelligent, can make people laugh, charming, have good prospects, give good hugs and have warm hands and feet. Often guys with none of these attributes seem to have more luck than me. Guys with many of them often seem to have less luck than me. Clearly these factors are completely irrelevant.
I have been asked on a number of occasions how I'm still single. This is always by girls who are not remotely interested in me.
It's all very odd.
edit: Have added comment screening by request. If you don't want to be unscreened let me know.
This isn't a whinge or a whine? I'm pretty okay with this at the moment. I'm mainly confused about it. More to the point it frequently causes me problems and I'd like to be able to solve it.
I'm reasonably good looking, I'm intelligent, can make people laugh, charming, have good prospects, give good hugs and have warm hands and feet. Often guys with none of these attributes seem to have more luck than me. Guys with many of them often seem to have less luck than me. Clearly these factors are completely irrelevant.
I have been asked on a number of occasions how I'm still single. This is always by girls who are not remotely interested in me.
It's all very odd.
edit: Have added comment screening by request. If you don't want to be unscreened let me know.
Re: Honest opinions....
Re: Honest opinions....
Nobody really knows what they want. A better question is what has attracted you in the past.
Re: Honest opinions....
Tom - looks, confidence, sense of humour, attitude towards me from the outset as someone who's primary goal was to just get to know me and nothing more, who genuinely felt like an equal, he doesn't do one upmanship or assume i will do something worse than him even for a second, and that comes across - alot of guys are fundamentally sexist no matter what they say, you can just tell when you're fiddling with that wheel nut that they think they could do it better.... Tom would be asleep on the back seat... that's another issue entirely.
If i could remember all their lj names i could list the other people in our group that i like... most of them are married or in relationships. There isn't a consistent look i like but most of these chaps are quirky or weird in one way or another, all are very confident, interesting and LARPers! They tend to be very friendly, happy to pay me compliments and flirt a bit but usually in full view of their partners. They all make me laugh and are very kind to everyone.... the latter a quality that i don't have myself but seem to find attractive in others. None of them assume girls will automatically fancy them back. But you get the immpression that if they didn't, they wouldn't care. Being a bit unatainable is attractive.
I like guys who are happy to insult me. Not in a mean way, i just like it when people can gently poke fun without being cruel...
I like inteligent guys, but you don't have to be in mensa or anything, just have considered opinions and be educated is enough. I HATE people who think they're cleverer than i am... i don't care if they're Einstein, i dislike show offs. I can't stand guys who have to be right all the time. It's just annoying and most of the time...your not.
I'm really difficult. There are easier girls out there, but these are some of the qualities that i find most attractive/most off putting etc...
I'm not sure that helps, but maybe it would if everyone else left their opinions and there was some kind of pattern.
Re: Honest opinions....
Generally, nice geeky guys with a sense of humour, generally those who are slighly shy. Preference for longer hair although all but one guy I've been with has had this. Nice eyes - hard to specify what makes them nice but the eyes are the window to the soul etc etc.
...although there are many nice geeky guys I don't fancy (such as yourself - sorry, these are the only consistent factors I can think of)
Specifically with Mark: I remember first impression of him was was a rather hot, fun & friendly geek! He has a wonderful smile, pretty eyes, he's open & friendly with everyone, he genuinly cares about all his friends. He has encyclopaedic knowledge of all things geeky. Most importantly I can talk to him about anything & everything without feeling ashamed, embarrased or awkward... except sometimes when I haven't seen the cartoons or films he has & so do not get all his quotes!
You can ask pepople to list all the things they like & don't like in a partner but that won't help... If I were to sit down & make a list pf all the things I find attractive Mark hasn't got them all, & he has other feathers that I love in him that I wouldn't have thought to put in my list. There's something else you need, sometimes you just click with someone. Little nuances of personality that fit perfectly.