Voice coaching - Wouldn't go amiss.... bu then I mumble & don't articulate well in normal conversation so I can hardly complain! (Plus I don't find it a problem with you. No more than with some other friends anyway).
Nervousness/shyness - it's there but isn't necessarily a bad thing...
As countesszero & invisigoth said, "something creepy" - this is I reckon your biggest downfall & it's hard to pin in down... Not that I think you are creepy but you can maybe come across as slightly creepy to people who don't know you... I think invisigoth had it right with it's more of an intensness - possibly a little too much invasion of personal space, intense eye contact & conversation right from the start, it feels a little forced I think.
It's hard to be objective about this as now these are just 'quirks of Neil' & not negative things.
Advice: Relax a bit more, think about personal space and maybe keep a little extra distance to begin with? Treat everyone you meet as a potential friend, nothing more - that's a difficult one I know. You seem to be meeting/going on one or two dates with lots of girls met online - Maybe treat this as a chance to enjoy meeting lots of different people & not as an opportunity to meet 'the one'?
It's difficult as everyone looks for different qualities in a partner & it's a combination of little things that determine who you fall for & who you don't. Geek girls seem to have rather strange sets of values which differ greatly between us as well!
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branchandroot
Honest opinions....
Date: 2010-02-08 09:54 am (UTC)Following on from previous comments...
Geekiness etc - no problem.
Voice coaching - Wouldn't go amiss.... bu then I mumble & don't articulate well in normal conversation so I can hardly complain! (Plus I don't find it a problem with you. No more than with some other friends anyway).
Nervousness/shyness - it's there but isn't necessarily a bad thing...
As countesszero & invisigoth said, "something creepy" - this is I reckon your biggest downfall & it's hard to pin in down... Not that I think you are creepy but you can maybe come across as slightly creepy to people who don't know you... I think invisigoth had it right with it's more of an intensness - possibly a little too much invasion of personal space, intense eye contact & conversation right from the start, it feels a little forced I think.
It's hard to be objective about this as now these are just 'quirks of Neil' & not negative things.
Advice: Relax a bit more, think about personal space and maybe keep a little extra distance to begin with? Treat everyone you meet as a potential friend, nothing more - that's a difficult one I know. You seem to be meeting/going on one or two dates with lots of girls met online - Maybe treat this as a chance to enjoy meeting lots of different people & not as an opportunity to meet 'the one'?
It's difficult as everyone looks for different qualities in a partner & it's a combination of little things that determine who you fall for & who you don't. Geek girls seem to have rather strange sets of values which differ greatly between us as well!